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Thursday, September 1, 2016
This morning, I took hubby to work in our old neighborhood.  The girls and I had 2-3 hours to kill and I decided to take a walk where hubby and I used to walk before they were born.  3 miles - it felt fantastic!  It is rare that I do uninterrupted walking .  I do 5ks once in awhile, but usually on our daily walks I am stopping a gazillion times for the kids and never get a good pace.  It's fun, but I don't get my  heart rate up.  It was really great, today!  Afterwards we went to the park and J had a fantastic time.  L was a little fussy, but oh well.  I'm trying to reorganize our time in a good way to prioritize the important stuff.

Anyways, since my meditations are part of the important stuff, I better get started.

Passage 1
HFT
After attending Al-Anon for a while, I realized that self-care didn't mean as much to me as it seemed to mean to other members. I thought I was doing a decent job of keeping myself clean and healthy. After talking about it with my sponsor, I became aware that although I did things to take care of myself, I did them with a focus on other people. I did them because other people expected me to do them, not because I cared about my own well-being. Gradually I realized that while growing up in an alcoholic home, I chose to ignore my natural feelings of self-love and self-worth because they didn't stop my parents from drinking or criticizing me.

The more I work my program, the more I come to understand that I am rebuilding my relationship with myself. Self-care is for me, not for others. Now that my motives for self-care are in the proper perspective, I make an effort to ask myself what matters in my life. I ask for my Higher Power's guidance before jumping into action. I pray for help in learning to love myself as my Higher Power loves me. The serenity I feel today when I do things to take care of myself is proof that my prayers are being answered.
Thought for the Day
Self-care reflects acceptance of my Higher Power's love for me.
"In Al-Anon we learn to pay attention to our own behavior, thoughts, and feelings. We deserve this attention, and we need it." Courage to Change, p. 359 

*I recently heard of a recovered drug addict keeping a picture of himself as a little boy in his car.  When he felt tempted, he would look at the picture and ask himself, "Would you give this boy drugs?"  It resonated with me!  Sometimes with negative self talk and something as concrete as looking at a picture or even imagining a picture.  Lately my best tool to avoid negative thoughts is the A-Z gratitude.  Hubby is "off" right now and it's difficult for me not to think too much about it.  I started doing the A-Z gratitude list with J and it helps a LOT!

PASSAGE 2
ODAT
When our problems enclose and saturate our thoughts, we find ourselves in an isolation that gives us an acute sense of loneliness. We may confide in friends, but underneath we feel nobody understands what we are going through.
Dwelling on our troubles only shuts out a world that is waiting to be enjoyed. Nothing has real power to deprive us of the delights to be found in many daily experiences -- even a routine household task, well done. For those of us who are fortunate enough to have young lives in our care, we can forget our troubles in devoting loving attention to them and their development. Observing our children is like reading a fascinating and often amusing book!
Today's Reminder
I may have big troubles but I can, if I will, make them less painful by turning my thoughts to happier things. I will not isolate myself in my problems. I will observe and enjoy what is good and pleasant in the world around me.
"Let me not deprive myself of the many little joys that are mine for the taking."

**For this one, I'll just say, "Progress, not perfection."  So difficult to change our thoughts, but lots of good techniques to

1 comments:

  1. Beautiful insights I needed to read in this moment. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete