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Friday, October 14, 2016
I am so grateful that I get to spend Fridays with my girls.  I have a makeup appt tonight, but it's not until 7pm.  I get all day with my sweet little ones.  We can go to the beach.  We can go apple picking.  Most likely, we will probably end up at the auto repair shop, because my car has needed fixing for a bit and today is a good time.............BUT, we could do anything.  The sky is the limit.  How wonderful!

We come to Al-anon because we believe it has something we want. In other words, we come to get something for ourselves. At first we have no idea that this “getting” is intimately involved with Giving.

We soon discover that our willingness to help others has an immediate and beneficent reaction on us. Our progress in the program depends on that satisfying sense of sharing, giving of ourselves, whether it be to enlighten and comfort a newcomer, serving as a group officer, supporting our fellowship or listening patiently to someone in trouble.

The more I give of myself and the more generously I open my heart and my mind to others, the more growth I will experience as I deal with my problems. I learn in Al-Anon never to measure my giving against my getting; the very giving provides my reward.
“The giver is only a channel for the gifts he has received from God. He cannot hoard or withhold them without blocking the channel.”

** I think I sometimes feel that me asking for help is an inconvenience on another.  I need to remember that I am giving that other person an opportunity to learn and grow and receive rewards, as well!

“Do not search for the truth,” said an ancient patriarch, “only cease to cherish opinions.” For me, ceasing to cherish opinions is part of the Tenth Step. Much of what I find wrong in my life is related to my opinions – that is, my prejudices, assumptions, self-righteous stances, attitudes.
For example, I continue to assume that I have the inside track on how everything should be done, and that other people are too short-sighted to recognize this great truth. Reality proves me wrong. I also revert to the idea that ignoring my feelings is practical, even desirable. This, too, is wrong. And I act as if I can run my life without my Higher Power. Wrong again.

I give thanks for Step Ten’s reminder that I need to continue taking personal inventory and making frequent corrections, especially in the areas where I tend to repeat my mistakes.

Today’s Reminder
It is no easy task to change the thinking of a lifetime, even when I am sure that I want to change. The Tenth Step allows me to be aware of sliding back in to faulty thinking. I don’t have to abuse myself when it happens – that doesn’t help at all. By promptly admitting when I’m wrong I am doing what I can to change.

“No longer must we accumulate burdens of guilt or resentment that will become heavier and more potent over time. Each day, each new moment can be an opportunity to clear the air, and start again, fresh and free.“ . In All Our Affairs


  1. I need to remember this: "I learn in Al-Anon never to measure my giving against my getting; the very giving provides my reward." I also liked your comment on the passage. I am always asking for favors and for help, but most of my friends are very independent women who don't like to ask for help, or think they even need it. It doesn't provide many opportunities for them to serve them, making me feel like we have an unbalanced friendship in which I am needy and they are giving. I appreciate the second passage as well! Every day is a chance for honest self-evaluation and small improvement. I hope you have a wonderful day with the girls!