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Wednesday, July 5, 2017
A few notes...............

1) I'm going to be delving into the ACOA side of my recovery.  I am exploring how I became the way I am.......... that it is normal, in my situation.  And how to change this.  

quote - "All the ingredients of being truly intimate, such as being vulnerable, allowing others to get close and liking ourselves, are the exact opposite of the survival skills developed by adults" raised in a shame based home.  Complete ACOA Sourcebook p.xiii

2) I read an old entry from when I was blogging in October of last year.  So much has changed since then.  Seeing that progress, made me feel great.  I then went back to July 2016 and realized that is when I started writing my blog again.  I thought it was much earlier.  I am giving myself some credit.  I have come a long way, in a short period of time.  ::::::::pat on back::::::::::::::::

3) Today was amazing and tiring.  I think I'll do my meditations first and then post on it.

Welll, actually, I'll do quick notes now.  I'm already so tired.

- ran 5k with the girlies.  It was so much fun!  I am very proud of myself for doing this.  it is a commitment that is very important to me.......... beach........ parade.......... free icecream...... so much candy........... grateful the parade was at the time needed............ super hot.......... super sore........... brought Hubby home in car................. kids slept in car............ I got fast food..............had


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::Apparently I fell asleep last night while writing this.  It's morning now, I'll continue


had......?  A nice relaxing break.  :) ................ firework excitement excitement excitement............ sleep.



It was a fantastic 4th of July.  And I'm so proud of myself for the gains I've made.  Hubby was planning on going with us to the 5k to cheer us on.  He changed his mind.  It was no big deal.  A year or two ago, I was so enmeshed that I would have considered a) not going, b) trying to make him go, c) getting upset and frustrated and sad.... feeling bad for myself, etc.  Yesterday, I simply knew that he changes his mind frequently, so maybe he'd go, maybe he wouldn't.  It was no big deal at all.  We had a phenomenal time at the race.

Same with the fireworks, actually.  Hubby wanted to be there, but messed up his ride situation and didn't make it.  I felt bad for him (and honestly, his family was underwhelmed when they realized it was just me...., oh well), but it didn't stop us from having a fantastic time.  

1 comments:

  1. Yay for a fun day and so much progress! Very fitting for Independence Day I think.

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